best thing i've read all day...

....aside from the half insightful/half crackpot new Lost theories floating around today.


From Wonkette:

"NY Rep Advocates Recruitment of Cunnilinguists

When we last cared about Gary Ackerman, he was accidentally voting against pornography. Yesterday, though, he planted himself firmly on the side of the steamy and unlikely fantasies of teenage boys.

“For some reason, the military seems more afraid of gay people than they are of terrorists, but they’re very brave with the terrorists…If the terrorists ever got hold of this information, they’d get a platoon of lesbians to chase us out of Baghdad…Considering the critical shortage of linguists in the armed forces, a platoon of Arabic-speaking lesbians may be just what the military needs.”
This suggestion was made to Condi Rice, who, we’re assuming, shifted uncomfortably in her seat the entire time. He continued:

“Can we marry up those two — or maybe that’s the wrong word — can we have some kind of union of those two issues?”
If we allow platoons of Arabic-speaking lesbians in the armed forces, next thing you know, we’ll have dog marines and box turtles manning tanks. Where does it end?"