it's 4am
I can’t sleep, even tho I was pretty damn tired a while ago. I’m debating going for a walk…or at least just going to sit on my stoop….but it’s 4am and it’s raining and that’s probably not the smartest idea. From weird dreams to thought processes that confuse me and I don’t feel like having, sleep isn’t working too well. Damn jet lag…if I wait 2 more hrs my body will think it’s time to sleep I think. Maybe now’s a good time to unpack…ha.
Right now, I just want to run away, back to the beach, say fuck it all and spend my days tanning in the water, selling sugar cane juice next to a waterfall and living in tropical oblivion. I guess I’d get bored eventually though…miss ordering in at 2am, miss the career I’m still trying to get off the ground all the way, miss my city and my friends (although most of them seem to be fans of this plan as well…getting some little shack on the beach and learning how to surf, race jet skiis, live off selling fruit to the tourists and like I told Rhi today, the more people in on the plan, the less of a shack it needs to be…we’ll be up to an oceanfront mansion in no time…).
This vacation solidified some of my larger dreams (goals actually, b/c for me the words are synonymous) of getting my house in Positano (my Amalfi coast town of choice at the moment) and having a beautiful ocean view to escape to. A little coastal town, where I’d keep my Italian fluent, learn how to make my own lemoncello, make friends in all the seaside restaurants and shops, and retreat to my house on the hill to watch the waves and drink lattes and write scripts and breathe….I wonder how many years it will take me to get there…10, 20, 30….
Mere hours back from this vacation, I’m already thinking about my next one…maybe a friend trip to somewhere warm sometime in December, visit Al in January….
At the moment I just want to say fuck it all and cut and run, but I don’t think I could take that plane ride again at the moment…I’m still wiped out from the last one.
Right now, I just want to run away, back to the beach, say fuck it all and spend my days tanning in the water, selling sugar cane juice next to a waterfall and living in tropical oblivion. I guess I’d get bored eventually though…miss ordering in at 2am, miss the career I’m still trying to get off the ground all the way, miss my city and my friends (although most of them seem to be fans of this plan as well…getting some little shack on the beach and learning how to surf, race jet skiis, live off selling fruit to the tourists and like I told Rhi today, the more people in on the plan, the less of a shack it needs to be…we’ll be up to an oceanfront mansion in no time…).
This vacation solidified some of my larger dreams (goals actually, b/c for me the words are synonymous) of getting my house in Positano (my Amalfi coast town of choice at the moment) and having a beautiful ocean view to escape to. A little coastal town, where I’d keep my Italian fluent, learn how to make my own lemoncello, make friends in all the seaside restaurants and shops, and retreat to my house on the hill to watch the waves and drink lattes and write scripts and breathe….I wonder how many years it will take me to get there…10, 20, 30….
Mere hours back from this vacation, I’m already thinking about my next one…maybe a friend trip to somewhere warm sometime in December, visit Al in January….
At the moment I just want to say fuck it all and cut and run, but I don’t think I could take that plane ride again at the moment…I’m still wiped out from the last one.
posted by ath at 4:41 AM
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